Boozhoo, Mondageesokwe here, I am a married, 43 year old adoptive and foster mother of two kids 5 and under. My husband and I work full time, six days a week with not much time for much else. I am on pandemic leave at the moment, getting a chance to make memories with my kids, be their mom/teacher/behavior manager. Summer is here, but we are still doing schoolwork. We are a multiracial family living in a small town in Michigan.
I am mixed Odawa, Ojibwe, Bodewadamie and Irish, my husband is White with tiny bit of native blood, my son is biracial Black and White, and my daughter is Ho Chunk and White.
Most days it feels like I am asked to be a race ambassador. If I go shopping outside of my tiny one store town with my kids without my husband, people give me the multiple baby daddies, ‘slut’ disapproving stares. If I am with my husband they look with pity on him fathering these kids that can’t be his.
I choose not to explain. I don’t have to.
However, if you say something derogatory or any slurs at me and mine, you best be ready to be confronted loudly, in public with 500 years of history.
I get asked a lot about race and ally-ship. Is this or that racist and how do I feel about it. I know that many of my darker skinned family and friends are being contacted as well. To quote the X-files “the truth is out there”. Contact groups, watch movies, read news articles, read books, there are Ted-talks and YouTube videos that are there for anti – racist training so you don’t exhaust your POC friends who are dealing and reeling from all the cumulative historical trauma, and the present trauma and violence. Here is an “Anti- racist starter pack” an article on parade.com There is a long list here of places to gain information for new allies. https://parade.com/1046031/breabaker/anti-racist-tv-movies-documentaries-ted-talks-books/
If you feel like your sick of hearing about it, imagine this is your everyday life. Everyday a person is killed by police, whenever you are pulled over you have to tell your phone to record as your heart is pounding in your ears. These are people from your community; they may be male, female, adults or kids. Trauma, grief, and stress are your normal. The fact is, America is in a state of re-evaluating its roots and its moral center and this is not as difficult as living as a POC with a target on your back.